Everyday Life for Four Seasons

The girls were sick today with your run-of-the-mill colds. We played at home this morning.


This afternoon we had a scheduled appointment to see a cardiologist to follow up with 'H's VSD (Ventricular Septal Defect). We already knew that it had closed up, but she was due for a follow-up appointment and I took her in to get some closure on the issue. Now it's officially official - it did clear up.


Both girls did a great job during the appointment. It probably helped that I gave them lollipops to suck on. I figured it would keep 'H' quiet during the EKG. The doctor also listened to her lungs and her junky cough and said she should get better on her own soon.

After some discussion and thought, the preschool decision has been made. We still can change our minds, but we've chosen a path to head down.

First, I visited the Montessori school today. There was a lot that I liked. It was very... Montessori. What I didn't like - and I still can't get over - is the price. $6,000! For a year of half day preschool! Yes, that's right, $6K. It isn't worth that much. Is there a preschool worth that much? Maybe in other places, for other people. Not for us.

Our final decision is one that I am very happy with. Neither 'A' nor 'H' will be enrolled in a formal preschool program next year. Their teacher will be *me* and we will continue to do all of the neat stuff we do now, only with a little bit more structure to it (hidden meaning: I won't be running errands whenever it suits my needs, and we will have a regular volunteer gig in town). I am thrilled. My children are just children, and they belong with me.

This is 'H' talking on the "phone" to Daddy. "Allo Dad-dy."

I called Jennifer, my sister, after I visited one of the preschools this morning. Jennifer is usually the person I check in with about big-life stuff. In my opinion, she is both very wise and absolutely crazy in her thought process, so I am always sure to get a nice, well-rounded response from her.

If I had to pick one word to describe the classroom, it would be "orderly." Everything was put away when I got there and the children were sitting in a circle on the floor, ready for Show and Tell. They raised their hands to speak and they sat still and paid attention. Sounds good to me! I love an orderly environment. But when I started to look around the room, I felt my breathing get tight. Everything was hung up in straight lines. And all of the artwork looked exactly the same. Apart from the child's name at the bottom, you couldn't tell who the artist was. It was like an accountant or mechanical engineer had come and decorated the room. Weird.

The children certainly were being prepared for Kindergarten, and for parents who want their children to know the right academic stuff and know how to follow along with the teacher, the program is probably perfect. That stuff isn't important to me. I teach that at home. 'A' knows how to follow the rules, wait in line and listen. She knows colors, numbers, her name.

Jennifer laughed. "Yes! I know! My kids were the same age as yours when I started going to all of those home school meetings."

What I want her to learn before Kindergarten is how to have confidence in her own decisions and how to respect herself. Girls can have such a hard time those first few years of school, as they figure out how to exert their influence, how to fit in, how to get through the day without being excluded or picked on by other girls. I don't expect that 'A' will be exempt from any of that behavior. More than anything, I want her to feel self-confident enough so that when other girls tell her that she can't play with them, she thinks, "they're not feeling good today. I'll have more fun with someone else right now," rather than, "they said I couldn't play with them, that must mean something is wrong with me."

She has one more year before we launch her into the cookie-cutter world of public school. For now, I want her in a program that values her individuality. I want her to feel comfortable being herself. When it's time for school, she'll most likely do fine. Jeff and I did exceptionally well in the school environment and we have no reason to believe our children won't do well. But school teaches academics and social conformity. I don't want to rush all of that, she has a whole lifetime ahead to try to gain knowledge and fit in with the group.

I'm meeting with the Montessori folks tomorrow.

PS Who went and bought all of the bok choy at the store? I couldn't find any today!

I have so many questions about something so simple. Where is 'A' going to go to preschool next year?


She has a few options. I can keep her at her current preschool, at the nursing home. Or I can send her to the new UPK in town. Or she could possibly go to the Montessori school in town. That's one where she would have to apply and be accepted.


All of these options have pros and cons. The real question I am asking is this: why is she going? There are so many things that she is learning at home with me and 'H' that she should be learning at home at this age. So, if I send her away for a few hours either 3 or 5 days a week, what might she be learning at preschool that she wouldn't learn at home? There are certain things that she learns when she's away from me that are good for her. My question involves the balance between the two. Is what she would be exposed to in preschool worth the 3 or 5 days away?


All preschools are not equal. At her current school, she would have regular contact with older adults and adults with physical needs. That is a huge plus. She also would have the same teacher who is familiar and comfortable with her dairy and egg allergies, also a huge plus. And I love the health and fitness aspect of the program, and the foreign language component. It's 3 days a week, also a huge plus for her. But it's in the afternoon, which is not my first choice.

At the UPK in town, ... Well, it's free, if the budget is passed (I'm not holding my breath this year, in this economy). I'm going to observe a class tomorrow morning so I'll know more about the huge pluses there soon. It's 5 days a week, not my first choice for 'A'.

The Montessori school is ultimately my first choice for her. She would do very well in their environment. She is heavily into role play now and I love that they build on the child's natural inclinations. She's very independent, very secure doing her own thing, and she likes it when others respect that. But it's 5 days a week. And probably prohibitively expensive, although I won't know how much it is until we fill out the financial aid paperwork.


In the grand scheme of things, it's really not a big deal. But in terms of our family life, it is a big deal. So many things to think about. And I'm running out of time.

This is what 'A' drew when no one was looking. I found it this morning. "Did you draw this cat?" I asked. "I drew those feet there." "How about the rest of it?" "Yes, it has a lot of whiskers."

This is the unicorn that lives with us!

It is so cold here! I tried to warm up the house by cooking today. Apple butter (takes forever!), apple sauce, pumpkin cupcakes and lentil soup. Jeff made pancakes for breakfast and he finished out the day by making popcorn for all of us.


Saturday nights are "Movie Night with the Girls" at our house. We eat an early dinner. Then Jeff makes popcorn and we all sit on the couch and watch a movie. Tonight we watched the original Adventures of Winnie the Pooh, always a favorite. After the movie, 'A' wanted to wave the Happy New Year signs she made with Rachel, the child care provider at the gym. So we got them out and waved them around and had a party.

The bok choy salad was good last night. I have to say, I do feel really good today, so maybe Roberta is right when she says that dark leafy greens will make you feel noticeably better. I went to 2 classes at the gym this morning: core strengthening and yoga. The core class was taught by a woman who is well known for her hard workouts. After I took her class last week, I couldn't move for a few days. Today I did okay - I was more in touch with my body during the classes and I feel great now.


Laurie G's Famous Bok Choy Salad

The Greens:
Dice up one head of bok choy and 2/3rds bunch of scallions

The Crunchies:
Heat up some canola oil and butter in a frying pan and cook until slightly browned:
Crushed up bag of ramen noodles (throw away the seasoning packet-easiest to crush it while it's still in the bag)
Sliced Almonds (a bunch)

The Dressing:
1/4 cup Canola oil
1/3 cup soy sauce
1/4 cup vinegar (we use rice vinegar or red wine vinegar)
6 teaspoons sugar

These photos chronicle our morning. This is what the breakfast table looks like at our house from my kitchen counter viewpoint. Usually the atmosphere is "rush rush" and usually it's my fault - I like to sleep as late as I can, and that sets us back a few minutes in the morning. The menu rarely changes - a pumpkin muffin for 'H' (I load the muffins up with whole wheat flour and flaxseed - good for her digestive health) and bread with tofutti cream cheese for 'A'. They share a piece of fruit or two and each get at least one big cup of OJ for a vitamin C boost. When Jeff is around, he makes them some porridge glop oatmeal.


It was snowing here all morning, even when it wasn't snowing in Schenectady or Saratoga Springs. We got a bunch.


On Thursdays, when breakfast is over, we pile into the car - quick, quick! - and drive 'A' to preschool.


This is the nursing home where she goes to school.


Then 'H' and I ran some errands. This is what downtown Saratoga Springs looked like this morning.


One of our stops was the grocery store. I am admitting that I have an imbalance. I need to change what I'm eating to feel better. Ever since the Christmas season started, I've been happily putting away sweets and carbs in amounts far greater than what my body needs. I haven't been hungry since the first day of Hanukkah, when I stuffed myself silly with practically all of Jeff's latkes. Ever since then, I think I feel hungry when really the sensation I'm feeling is my large, full stomach starting to empty out. "I hear grumbling! Time to fill it up again!"

It has to STOP!

Dinner tonight is Laurie G's bok choy salad, some brown rice, and some Asian chicken. Laurie's salad is always a hit at our table and makes us feel less like lethargic cows and more like the trim little mice we want to be. And, if I listen to Roberta Tabachneck, a holistic counselor, I will feel noticably better after eating my dark leafy greens, so check in tomorrow to see if that's true!


Speaking of mice, the exterminator saga, which was supposed to end today, is still on indefinitely because the "live harvest" is still yielding some live ones. Yum.

Above is my Proud Mama photo of the day. 'H' was so proud of herself for figuring out how to match up her fingers and hold her hands in a triangle pose. I remember when 'A' learned how to do that too, and she was just as proud. I pulled over and snapped her photo on the spot!


Back at preschool for pick-up. 'A' wasn't ready to stop listening to the story, so she and 'H' sat on the rug with the kids who were waiting for their parents and they listened to Miss J. tell an Eric Carle story.


Miss J. is not the regular teacher - she comes in once a week for exercise time. She used to teach regularly but retired.


We packed up and got ready to go home and have lunch and take a nap. The letter of the day was 'L' and we had brought in a lollipop, with the agreement that 'A' could eat it after class. She made sure she had her lollipop all ready to go!


Today was teddy bear day. I *think* this is a hand puppet?


Jeff should enjoy shoveling out the snow and the mailbox tonight.

We finally received the scarf that Grandma Shelly made for 'H'! It looks like it got "lost" in the mail for a few days. The mail in our neighborhood used to get mixed up a lot, and then I started giving our mailman presents, kind of as insurance against the mix ups. We haven't had any known issues since I started the gifting over a year ago. Until now.


Anyway, it's here and it is so adorable! She loves it. 'A' got hers out for the photo shoot too.


Today we have snow and freezing rain, and it's still coming down. Jeff is working from home and I didn't bother to take the girls to their first music class with Miss Barbara at the Community Center. It wasn't worth it to go out in this weather. So instead, we stayed home in our pajamas and painted at the easel!


The paints were finger paints but since I have the children with the neatness complex, both immediately asked for a brush. 'A' uses finger paints at preschool so she is much more accustomed to using her hands for painting. I had always pegged 'H' as the tactile, hands-on kind of kid, but maybe she's not. She did get into it eventually and by the end of the painting session they were both covered.


My exterminator friend came by and found two flying squirrels and again, no mice. No mice? Where are they? The squirrels die as soon as they are caught because apparently their hearts are weak and their systems go into overload when the adrenaline hits. Not that you asked or anything.


Emily mailed me The Ten Year Nap, a novel by Meg Wolitzer. It's actually Cathy's copy and I am looking forward to reading it. It's about navigating the motherhood waters. I also picked up I Was a Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids by Trisha Ashworth and Amy Nobile at the library yesterday, also about navigating the waters.


Enjoy your day!