Everyday Life for Four Seasons

'A' has taken to designing "fabric" using plain white paper and pencils or markers. She sells it in her fabric store to anyone who will stop by. Some of her designs are full pictures with scenery, and some are prints and patterns.

She decided to do all of this because, you know, back in Laura's and Mary's day, someone would have printed the fabric and sold it in a store. And she's just like them.

From time to time I've talked about 'A's approach to learning how to read and write. A while ago I decided to give up on actively teaching her how to read. It seemed that no matter what approach I took, it ended with tears and frustration. She's not open to overt instruction when it comes to reading. She:

* will only do something if she can do it perfectly the first time (this is a painful way to go through life, and I am on the lookout for gentle ways to show her that it's okay to try and not be perfect, over and over again)

* blames others when she feels frustrated. Example: she wants to read a book, and picks one out. She sits next to me to try to read it but is frustrated with the process. She starts to yell at me because she "can't do it".

On the bright side, she also:

* is the most highly motivated child I have ever met. She does things because she wants to do them, not because other people want her to. She appreciates praise but is not motivated by it (the way 'H' is - what different personalities they have!)

* loves to write, draw, hear stories, act out stories and make up her own stories. I'm not a childhood education expert by any means, but I think those things are important ingredients in the Learning How to Read recipe.

Also on the bright side, I've learned:

* when she reads and gets stuck on a word, I help her out by telling her if the vowel is a short or long sound.

* as soon as I sense her frustration mounting, I ask her if she would like to stop reading.

* I ask her once a day if she would like to do a little reading, but it's a quick question and if she says "no," I don't say anything else.

Lately she's been writing note after note after note and giving it to anyone who is interested. They're all written phonetically, so it sometimes takes me a few minutes to figure it out what she's trying to say. The funny thing is that even though many of her words are misspelled, she honestly believes that they are correct. That's why she can write them and still feel as though she's doing it perfectly the first time.

Now that I have some experience working with 'A' as she learns to read and write, and I understand her approach, I appreciate the effort she puts into her phonetic notes. Everything about them is self-motivated: deciding when to write and what to write are her decisions. I think this is a significant step for her and she is now finding herself further along on her journey toward literacy.

As much as I think this is a good thing for 'A', I have a real problem with learning how to read phonetically. Both Jeff and I learned to read in the 70's, when learning phonetically was all the rage in our classrooms. But the English language, with all the exceptions to the rules, isn't designed to be learned phonetically. Perhaps our brains learn better by sounding things out, and we just have the wrong language to learn? Take simple words that 'A' has tried to sound out this week: Of, One, Where. When she follows The Rules I teach her about short and long vowel sounds, those words sound like this:
Of = Ah-f
One = Oh-n
Where = Weer

And when she's busy writing her phonetic notes, she always sounds out "of" and writes "av". Yes, "of" does sound like it should be written "av," at least the way we pronounce it in our home.

When she's open to it, I show her how to spell a word or two and have her write it out 10 times, with the hope that it will "stick". There are some things that simply must be learned by memorization and drill. I guess the puzzle is figuring out when she's ready to learn them. My thoughts now are that she'll continue to write her phonetic notes and at some point she'll incorporate the correct spellings as they start to make sense to her and she remembers them.

As I write all of this, she's sitting down to read a few pages of "Biscuit Meets the Class Pet." I took a quick photo. She's reading beautifully. Clearly she's memorized some of the words and some she's sounding out. What I really like is how she reads with emotion, as if she's telling the story to someone and wants it to sound interesting. I dared to tell her that. I added something about how not everyone reads aloud like that and she responded with, "I don't care how other people do it."

A journey, folks. This is a journey and she and I are both on it.

I was working with 'A' on a number of projects today and thought I would snap a quick photo of our table. Oak leaves for a leaf collecting project; a book about space; shrinky dink paper and colored pencils; spelling lessons. It's not unusual for the table to be covered with a number of in-progress projects.

We spent the morning at home but originally had other plans: we were supposed to wake up bright and early and head to the Adirondacks to the Warren County Fish Hatchery with home school friends for a class. Today's thunderstorms kept us all away.

Here's something that falls under the "interesting but not surprising" category. In the last week, while I've been trying to keep a low profile in order to heal, I've found that the quality of my parenting has gone up dramatically. The girls and I usually have good days, but there are times of the day when the tension rises: leaving the house and trying to get somewhere on time and cleaning up toys are the main ones. But this past week, the tense moments simply aren't popping up. For starters, we haven't had to be anywhere on time because I've cancelled all of our outings. But it's more than that. The girls have been a pure pleasure to be with, all day, every day. They've been so caring, creative and responsible. And responsive. They're both quick to use problem-solving skills when they encounter something that frustrates or confuses them. When they can't figure something out on their own, they ask me for help instead of whining and demanding a solution. Wow, I can't tell you what a difference this shift makes for our family harmony.

I'm sure that part of it relates to the fact that I've slowed down. I'm feeling more relaxed, playful and spontaneous, and they pick up on that. The lesson is, what's good for mom is good for the children, and what's good for the children is good for the whole family.

Some of the foundations of our homeschooling life are learning to appreciate nature and appreciate the community in which we live. We like to explore new venues, but day after day, we frequent the same places and say hello to the same people. My girls have come to know many adults who care about them, and they look forward to our time out and about. Today we journeyed back to Denison Farm, the farm where we pick up our vegetables every week all summer long. It was our first trip of the season. How we looked forward to it! It's not that anything spectacular happens each time we're there. What's magical is knowing the people who grow our food (Justine and Brian Denison); being surprised (and impressed) by the vegetables we receive every week; and returning to a beautiful, quiet farm week after week; making our way down the to the creek, saying hello to the goats, and looking for wildflowers along the way.

Life lessons for little homeschoolers: notice the butterflies; see crops grow and change throughout the season; say hello to adults and remember their names; find comfort in seasonal routines; be respectful of hot, sleeping goats; don't wade too far into murky water; enjoy food that's grown close to home. I think those are good lessons.

As I've said recently, we're more of an unschooling family than anything else. That means we don't follow a specific curriculum but instead take opportunities to learn as they come our way. This week our resident House Finch family that built a nest in the hanging plant at our front door has been the inspiration for learning more about birds. The girls and I checked out a few library books in hopes of finding answers to the following questions:

How does the mother lay eggs?
Do other birds move into the nest after one bird family is done with it?
What do newly hatched birds eat?
How long do birds live?
Why do birds such as cowbirds lay their eggs in another bird's nest?

I also found this fantastic online resource that outlines an activity for building a nest.

Using the books, the nest outside our door and a naturalist class or two, we'll find out the answers to these questions.