Everyday Life for Four Seasons

Both of my girls were born in the early part of the year, so by the time they "discovered" snow, they were well past the year and a half mark. They were too young their first winter to really understand what it was or notice if it was there or not. By discovering snow, I mean they realized that it was coming down, or that it had come down and the ground looked different, and they would point and squeal about it. When they walked in it for the first time, ('A' was outside at the Clifton Park mall in December 2006 and 'H' was leaving church last Sunday when the discovery happened) they both did the same thing: bent down and poked it, then really dug in. And they kept coming back for more, despite the fact that their little hands were red and wet and cold!

Here are some shots of 'H' on her discovery day last Sunday.


This time of year is a good time to try to articulate my spiritual path and my religious beliefs. Jeff and I were raised in different religious traditions - me, Protestant and he, Jewish, and every December we are thrown into a whirlwind of socially accepted rituals, some of which we embrace and some we don't. 'A' is old enough to ask questions and to start to understand the meanings of the holidays, and I've found myself thinking about how to explain some of it to her.

Although Jeff and I come from different backgrounds, we both have a lot of questions and aren't interested in living strictly according to our own religions. One of the more interesting things about our relationship is where we stand on our own spiritual paths. I would say that at the moment, our paths are headed in a similar direction and they run fairly parallel, with similar questions and similar priorities. Speaking for myself, in a nutshell, I am not certain that Jesus was the son of God and I am not convinced that he rose from the dead. I would actually say that I am fairly certain about this but I don't want to close myself off to the possibility that perhaps the stories about God and Jesus are all true. I don't know where my path is taking me and I want to remain open to changing my perspective about spirituality and my beliefs. But for now, I don't believe, and since those are the two fundamental beliefs of Christianity, it's hard for me to celebrate Christmas in the traditional Christian way. I do believe that Jesus was a great person though and I am happy to celebrate a day in honor of him (I tell 'A' that we celebrate his birthday on Christmas Day even though I feel like a liar because we all know he wasn't born in December). I tell her what I believe, that he was a good person and we can be happy to honor him. I tell her about the Christian manger story and say that some people prefer that version. I tell her about nature and short days and the traditions of bringing a bit of the natural world and the bright lights into our homes. I tell her about the importance of giving to people who are not as fortunate as we are. I tell her that Santa Claus is only a small part of the Christmas story.

It's easy to list what I tell her, but so hard for me to get it all across when we talk. She's three. That's one part of it. But also, since my beliefs don't fit into the traditional ones, it's hard for me to follow the mainstream Christmas story and expect my kids to absorb it and love it too. I am still getting my story straight with myself. And now I have to tell it to two little people who think everything I say is The Truth.


I said that Jeff and I have similar goals relating to spirituality. Some of these are purely spiritual, meshing well with the mission statements of the Unitarian Universalist church, which I'll tell you about in a minute. Some of them, though, are things we want for our family that we both received through our religious upbringing. We would say that our parents were fairly active with their church and temple. My parents rarely skipped a Sunday morning at church. They held positions on committees, in the choir, as deacons, Sunday School teachers... you name it, they did it. Jeff's parents were active in their temple. Two things that came from that environment that we feel are important for our children are: #1, it is very comforting for children to know that every Friday night or Sunday morning, no matter what, they are going to be going to the same structured place where they are welcomed and loved by other children and adults. #2, it is highly beneficial for teenagers to have a group of peers outside of their jr. or sr. high school, outside of any other social group they belong to, to turn to for support and companionship. I firmly believe that my church Youth Group friends got me through some of the toughest years of my teenage life in one piece.

We attend weekly services at the Unitarian church. We haven't become members yet. Yet. We like to go, but something hasn't clicked yet where we want to commit to being members. OK, maybe it's a general fear of commitment, which isn't out of the question for us. It's also partly that the congregation seems older than us. Not by a lot, but enough to be older. As Jeff points out, the people who attend are asking serious questions about life and themselves and a lot of people probably don't do that until they are in their mid to late 30's (that's us), so it makes sense that we're some of the younger - and newer - attendees.

This is what the Unitarians believe, copied directly from the UU website.

There are seven principles which Unitarian Universalist congregations affirm and promote:

• The inherent worth and dignity of every person;
  


• Justice, equity and compassion in human relations;
  


• Acceptance of one another and encouragement to spiritual growth in our congregations;
  


• A free and responsible search for truth and meaning;
  


• The right of conscience and the use of the democratic process within our congregations and in society at large;
  


• The goal of world community with peace, liberty, and justice for all;
  


• Respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part.
  

Unitarian Universalism UU) draws from many sources:

Direct experience of that transcending mystery and wonder, affirmed in all cultures, which moves us to a renewal of the spirit and an openness to the forces which create and uphold life;

Words and deeds of prophetic women and men which challenge us to confront powers and structures of evil with justice, compassion, and the transforming power of love;

Wisdom from the world's religions which inspires us in our ethical and spiritual life;

Jewish and Christian teachings which call us to respond to God's love by loving our neighbors as ourselves;

Humanist teachings which counsel us to heed the guidance of reason and the results of science, and warn us against idolatries of the mind and spirit.

Spiritual teachings of earth-centered traditions which celebrate the sacred circle of life and instruct us to live in harmony with the rhythms of nature.